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Attachment: Resources for Families, Caregivers and Individuals

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Featured Books in this Category / Main Booklist

Featured Books

All About Ben: Helping Children with Attachment Issues to Understand Their Feelings. Dorothy Markham & Aileen O'Donnell, $17.95 (ages 5-9)

This reassuring story helps children aged 5+ with attachment issues to understand their feelings, open up to a caring adult and learn how to choose positive behaviours. Ben is made up of lots of different 'parts' — to name a few, he has happy, caring, angry, excited, hugging and yelling parts. Ben explains how all these parts are okay, and that a caring adult can help you to understand and manage them more easily.

This book also features activities to help children talk about their feelings, and a simple introduction to attachment theory for adults.


Attaching In Adoption: Practical Tools for Today's Parents. Deborah Gray, $29.95

Attaching In Adoption is a comprehensive guide for prospective and actual adoptive parents on how to understand and care for their adopted child and promote healthy attachment.

This classic text provides practical parenting strategies designed to enhance children's happiness and emotional health. It explains what attachment is, how grief and trauma can affect children's emotional development, and how to improve attachment, respect, cooperation and trust. Parenting techniques are matched to children's emotional needs and stages, and checklists are included to help parents assess how their child is doing at each developmental stage. The book covers a wide range of issues including international adoption, Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, and learning disabilities, and combines sound theory and direct advice with case examples throughout.

This book is a must read for anyone interested in adoption and for all adoptive families. It will also be a valuable resource for adoption professionals.


The Attachment Effect: Exploring the Powerful Ways Our Earliest Bond Shapes Our Relationships and Lives. Peter Lovenheim, $22.00

Attachment theory is having a moment. It’s the subject of much-shared articles and popular relationship guides. Why is this fifty-year-old theory, widely accepted in psychological circles, suddenly in vogue? Because people are discovering how powerfully it sheds light on who we love — and how.

Fascinated by the subject, award-winning journalist and author Peter Lovenheim embarked on a journey to understand it from the inside out. Interviewing researchers, professors, counselors, and other experts, as well as individuals and couples whose attachment stories illuminate and embody the theory's key concepts. The result is this engaging and revealing book, which is part journalism, part memoir, part psychological guide — and a fascinating read for anyone who wants to better understand the needs and dynamics that drive the complex relationships in their lives. Topics include:

  • What it means to be securely and insecurely attached
  • How our early childhood experiences create a blueprint for future relationships — and how to use those insights to gain self-awareness and growth
  • Why anxious and avoidant attachment types tend to attract each other, and how to break the negative cycle
  • How anyone can work to become "earned secure" regardless of their upbringing and past relationships

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Attachment-Focused Parenting: Effective Strategies to Care for Children. Daniel Hughes, $42.00

An expert clinician brings attachment theory into the realm of parenting skills. Attachment security and affect regulation have long been buzzwords in therapy circles, but rarely are they effectively applied to basic parenting skills. Here, a leading attachment specialist brings attachment work inside the therapy room to the outside, equipping caregivers with practical parenting techniques rooted in attachment theory and research.


The A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting: Strategies and Solutions. Sarah Naish, $31.95

Therapeutic parenting is a deeply nurturing parenting style, and is especially effective for children with attachment difficulties, or who experienced childhood trauma. This book provides everything you need to know in order to be able to effectively therapeutically parent.

Providing a model of intervention, The A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting gives parents or caregivers an easy to follow process to use when responding to issues with their children. The following A-Z covers 60 common problems parents face, from acting aggressively to difficulties with sleep, with advice on what might trigger these issues, and how to respond. Easy to navigate and written in a straightforward style, this book is a 'must have' for all therapeutic parents.


Becoming Attached: First Relationships and How They Shape Our Capacity to Love. Robert Karen, $31.50

In Becoming Attached, Robert Karen offers fresh insight into some of the most fundamental issues of emotional life. He explores such questions as: What do children need to feel that the world is a positive place and that they have value? What are the risks of day care for children under one year of age, and what can parents do to manage those risks?

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Brain-Based Parenting: the Neuroscience of Caregiving for Healthy Attachment. Daniel Hughes & Jonathan Baylin, $38.95

In this groundbreaking exploration of the brain mechanisms behind healthy caregiving, attachment specialist Daniel Hughes and veteran clinical psychologist Jonathan Baylin guide readers through the intricate web of neuronal processes, hormones, and chemicals that drive — and sometimes thwart — our caregiving impulses, uncovering the mysteries of the parental brain. 

The biggest challenge to parents, Hughes and Baylin explain, is learning how to regulate emotions that arise — feeling them deeply and honestly while staying grounded and aware enough to preserve the parent–child relationship. Learning to be a "good parent" is contingent upon learning how to manage stress, understand its brain-based cues, and respond in a way that will set the brain back on track. With this awareness, we learn how to approach kids with renewed playfulness, acceptance, curiosity, and empathy, re-regulate our caregiving systems, foster deeper social engagement, and facilitate our children's development.

Infused with clinical insight, illuminating case examples, and helpful illustrations, Brain-Based Parenting brings the science of caregiving to light for the first time. Far from just managing our children's behavior, we can develop our "parenting brains," and with a better understanding of the neurobiological roots of our feelings and our own attachment histories, we can transform a fraught parent-child relationship into an open, regulated, and loving one.


Connecting with Kids through Stories: Using Narratives to Facilitate Attachment in Adopted Children, 2nd Edition. Denise Lacher, Todd Nichols & Joanne May, $30.95

Children whose early development has been damaged by abuse or neglect are notoriously difficult to reach. Connecting with Kids through Stories is an accessible guide to Family Attachment Narrative Therapy for the parents of adopted or fostered children, and for the professionals who work with them. Providing a thorough theoretical grounding, and detailed information on therapeutic techniques and how to assess progress, the book shows parents how to create their own therapeutic stories to promote increased attachment and improved behavior in their child. The authors describe how different kinds of narratives can help with specific difficulties and illustrate their techniques with the story of a fictional family who develop their own narratives to help their adopted child heal.


Creating Loving Attachments: Parenting with PACE to Nurture Confidence and Security in the Troubled Child. Daniel Hughes & Kim Golding, $33.95

All children need love, but for troubled children, a loving home is not always enough. Children who have experienced trauma need to be parented in a special way that helps them feel safe and secure, builds attachments and allows them to heal.

Playfulness, acceptance, curiosity and empathy (PACE) are four valuable elements of parenting that, combined with love, can help children to feel confident and secure. This book shows why these elements are so important to a child's development, and demonstrates to parents and carers how they can incorporate them into their day-to-day parenting. Real life examples and typical dialogues between parents and children illustrate how this can be done in everyday life, and simple stories highlight the ideas behind each element of PACE.

This positive book will help parents and carers understand how parenting with love and PACE is invaluable to a child's development, and will guide them through using this parenting attitude to help their child feel happy, confident and secure.

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The Defiant Child: a Parent’s Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Douglas Riley, $18.95

The Defiant Child guides readers through the difficulties of raising a child or teenager who is attempting to ignore or defeat them at every turn. While it explains how defiant children and teens think, delving deeply into the mistaken ideas that lead them to believe that it is safe to ignore parents and challenge their authority, its chief purpose is to provide parents with a step-by-step plan to regain peace and harmony in the family.


8 Keys to Building Your Best Relationships. Daniel Hughes, $21.00

A revolution is under way in how we understand the nature of relationships, how we develop in those relationships, and how our brains function synergistically in connection with others. This field is known as attachment theory, and veteran therapist and specialist in attachment disorders Daniel Hughes demystifies the research in this practical guide.

By summarizing in short, easy-to-read “keys” the theory and brain science that underpin our ability to form relationships, he skillfully reveals how we can become better friends, spouses, siblings, and children. For anyone interested in how to develop meaningful new relationships or how to deepen and enrich their current ones, this book makes sense of it all.


Everyday Parenting with Security and Love: Using PACE to Provide Foundations for Attachment. Kim Golding, $33.95

Children who have experienced trauma, loss or separation early in life need more than just special care and attention; they need to be parented with love and security in a way that allows them to heal and rebuild emotional bonds. This comprehensive book provides parents and carers with crucial advice and guidance on how to strengthen attachment and trust.

Based on Dan Hughes' proven 'PACE' model of therapeutic parenting, this book explains how to implement PACE techniques to overcome the challenges faced by children who struggle to connect emotionally. Barriers to stable relationships such as a lack of trust, fear of emotional intimacy, and high levels of shame are all explained. It explores techniques to overcome these barriers by teaching how to support the child's behaviour at the same time as building empathy and trust.

The practical parenting guidance offered throughout is essential for carers or parents of troubled children, and will help build safe, secure emotional relationships.

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Games and Activities for Attaching with Your Child. Deborah Gray & Megan Clarke, $22.95

Packed full of great ideas for fun games and activities, this book encourages positive attachments between a parent or carer and their child.

When it comes to choosing the best games to play with children who have difficulties attaching, it is often hard to know how to play with a purpose. This book contains fun, age-appropriate games along with an explanation of why they matter. All the games included are designed for specific age ranges, from infants to older children, and help to address particular needs in children that are known to affect attachment, including fetal alcohol spectrum disorder. It provides an easy-to-understand description of attachment and reveals the crucial role that play has in forming attachments. 

Written for parents and carers, as well as for use by professionals, it is full of strategies to help build healthy attachments in children who have experienced early trauma.


The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans: How to Decode Their Behavior, Develop Unshakeable Trust, and Raise a Respectable Adult. Josh Shipp, $33.50

In 2015, Harvard researchers found that every child who does well in the face of adversity has had at least one stable and committed relationship with a supportive adult. But Josh Shipp didn’t need Harvard to know that. Once an at-risk foster kid, he was headed straight for trouble until he met the man who changed his life: Rodney, the foster parent who refused to quit on Shipp and got him to believe in himself.

Now, in The Grown-Up’s Guide to Teenage Humans, Shipp shows all of us how to be that caring adult in a teenager’s life. Stressing the need for compassion, trust, and encouragement, he breaks down the phases of a teenage human from sixth to twelfth grade, examining the changes, goals, and mentality of teenagers at each stage. Shipp offers revelatory stories that take us inside the teen brain, and shares wisdom from top professionals and the most expert grown-ups. Written in Shipp’s playfully authoritative, no-nonsense voice, The Grown-Up’s Guide to Teenage Humans tells his story and unpacks practical strategies that can make a difference. Ultimately, it's not about shortcuts or magic words — as Shipp reminds us, it’s about investing in kids and giving them the love, time, and support they need to thrive. And that means every kid is one caring adult away from being a success story.


Love, Fear, and Health: How Our Attachments to Others Shape Health and Health Care. Robert Mauner & Jonathan Hunter, $30.95

Can the way in which we relate to others seriously affect our health? Can understanding those attachments help health care providers treat us better? In Love, Fear, and Health, psychiatrists Robert Maunder and Jonathan Hunter draw on evidence from neuroscience, stress physiology, social psychology, and evolutionary biology to explain how understanding attachment — the ways in which people seek security in their close relationships – can transform patient outcomes.

Using attachment theory, Maunder and Hunter provide a practical, clinically focused introduction to the influence of attachment styles on an individual’s risk of disease and the effectiveness of their interactions with health care providers. Drawing on more than fifty years of combined experience as health care providers, teachers, and researchers, they explain in clear language how health care workers in all disciplines can use this knowledge to meet their patients’ needs better and to improve their health.

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The Neuroscience of Human Relationships: Attachment and the Developing Brain. Louis Cozolino, $63.50

As human beings, we cherish our individuality yet we know that we live in constant relationship to others, and that other people play a significant part in regulating our emotional and social behavior. Although this interdependence is a reality of our existence, we are just beginning to understand that we have evolved as social creatures with interwoven brains and biologies. The human brain itself is a social organ and to truly understand being human, we must understand not only how we as whole people exist with others, but how our brains, themselves, exist in relationship to other brains.

Technical advances now provide more windows into our inner neural universe and terms like attachment, empathy, compassion, and mindfulness have begun to appear in the scientific literature. Overall, there has been a deepening appreciation for the essential interdependence of brain and mind. More and more parents, teachers, and therapists are asking how brains develop, grow, connect, learn, and heal. The new edition of this book organizes this cutting-edge, abundant research and presents its compelling insights, reflecting a host of significant developments in social neuroscience.

The Neuroscience of Human Relationships gives readers a deeper appreciation of how and why relationships have the power to reshape our brains throughout our life.


New Families, Old Scripts: a Guide to the Language of Trauma and Attachment in Adoptive Families. Caroline Archer & Caroline Gordon, $33.95

Most adopted children and their families will, sooner or later, encounter the challenges of dealing with unresolved attachment issues or early traumatic experiences. New Families, Old Scripts is an accessible introduction to understanding these challenges and helping children and their families to develop a shared language and understanding of one another … The accessible combination of theoretical approaches and practical advice makes New Families, Old Scripts an ideal resource for social workers and adoptive or foster parents.


No Matter What: an Adoptive Family’s Story of Hope, Love and Healing. Sally Donovan, $19.95

This book tells the uplifting true story of an ordinary couple who build an extraordinary family — describing Sally and Rob Donovan's journey from a diagnosis of infertility to their decision to adopt two children who suffered abuse in their early life. Writing with incisive wit and honesty, Sally Donovan recounts the bewildering logistics of adoption and, after Sally and Rob are joyfully matched with siblings Jaymee and Harlee, how their joy is followed by shock as they discover disturbing details of their children's past. Determined to heal their children, Sally and Rob realize they will need to go 'beyond parenting' to give them with the help they need.

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1-2-3 Magic

1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2 – 12, 6th Edition. Thomas Phelan, $22.50; DVD $55.95

This award-winning, bestselling book in a new edition is now even easier to use with an updated internal design that is user-friendly and has more visual interest. The 6th Edition is more engaging and browse-able for the reader. We’ve also added a handy new index. The world's simplest and most effective parenting program is all right here!

  • Part I: Building a Solid Foundation for Parenting
  • Part II: Controlling Obnoxious Behavior: Parenting Job 1
  • Part III: Managing Testing and Manipulation
  • Part IV: Encouraging Good Behavior: Parenting Job 2
  • Part V: Strengthening Your Relationship with Your Children: Parenting Job 3
  • Part VI: Enjoying Your New Family Life

Parenting the Hurt Child: Helping Adoptive Families Heal and Grow. Gregory Keck & Regina Kupecky, $21.50

The world is full of hurt children, and bringing one into your home can quickly derail the easy family life you once knew. Get effective suggestions, wisdom, and advice to parent the hurt child in your life.

Parenting the Hurt Child explains how to manage a hurting child with loving wisdom and resolve and how to preserve your stability while untangling their thorny hearts.


Parenting with Theraplay®: Understanding Attachment and How to Nurture a Closer Relationship with Your Child. Vivien Norris & Helen Rodwell, $21.95

Theraplay® is an attachment-focused model of parenting that helps parents to understand and relate to their child. Based on a sequence of play activities that are rooted in neuroscience, Theraplay® offers a fun and easy way for parents and children to connect. Theraplay® is particularly effective with looked after and adopted children.

By providing an overview of Theraplay® and the psychological principles that it is based on, parents and carers will gain an understanding of the basic theory of the model along with practical ideas for applying Theraplay® to everyday family life. Through everyday case studies and easy language, parents will gain confidence and learn new skills for emotional bonding, empathy, and acceptance in the relationship with their child.

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Raising a Secure Child: How Circle of Security Parenting Can Help You Nurture Your Child's Attachment, Emotional Resilience, and Freedom to Explore. Kent Hoffman, Glen Cooper & Bert Powell, $19.95

Today's parents are constantly pressured to be perfect. But in striving to do everything right, we risk missing what children really need for lifelong emotional security. Now the simple, powerful "Circle of Security" parenting strategies that Kent Hoffman, Glen Cooper, and Bert Powell have taught thousands of families are available in self-help form for the first time. You will learn:

  • How to balance nurturing and protectiveness with promoting your child's independence
  • What emotional needs a toddler or older child may be expressing through difficult behavior
  • How your own upbringing affects your parenting style — and what you can do about it

Filled with vivid stories and unique practical tools, this book puts the keys to healthy attachment within everyone's reach — self-understanding, flexibility, and the willingness to make and learn from mistakes.


Reparenting the Child Who Hurts: a Guide to Healing Developmental Trauma and Attachments. Caroline Archer & Christine Gordon, $31.95

Finally, a parenting book which demystifies the latest thinking on neurobiology, physiology and trauma and explains what the research means for the everyday life of parents of children who hurt. As experts on adoption and fostering who are adoptive parents themselves, Caroline Archer and Christine Gordon explain how this knowledge can help parents to better understand and care for their child. They explain why conventional parenting techniques are often not helpful for the child who has experienced early trauma and explore why therapeutic reparenting is the only way to help repair the unhealthy neurobiological and behavioural patterns which affect the child's development. They do not shy away from how difficult reparenting is, acknowledging how hard it can be to recognize our own fallibility as parents and to change our own parenting patterns. The authors also offer hard-won advice on a range of common parenting flashpoints — from defusing arguments and aggression to negotiating bedtimes and breaks in routine, and making sure that special occasions are remembered for all the right reasons.

Reparenting the Child Who Hurts is a humane, no-nonsense survival guide for any parent caring for a child with developmental trauma or attachment difficulties, and will also provide information and insights for social workers, teachers, counsellors and other professionals involved in supporting adoptive and foster families.

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Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain, 2nd Edition. Sue Gerhardt, $37.50

Why Love Matters explains why loving relationships are essential to brain development in the early years, and how these early interactions can have lasting consequences for future emotional and physical health. This second edition follows on from the success of the first, updating the scientific research, covering recent findings in genetics and the mind/body connection, and including a new chapter highlighting our growing understanding of the part also played by pregnancy. Sue Gerhardt focuses in particular on the wide-ranging effects of early stress on a baby or toddler’s developing nervous system. When things go wrong with relationships in early life, the dependent child has to adapt; what we now know is that his or her brain adapts too. The brain’s emotion and immune systems are particularly affected by early stress and can become less effective. This makes the child more vulnerable to a range of later difficulties such as depression, anti-social behaviour, addictions or anorexia, as well as physical illness.

Why Love Matters is an accessible, lively, account of the latest findings in neuroscience, developmental psychology and neurobiology – research which matters to us all. It is an invaluable and hugely popular guide for parents and professionals alike.


Your Defiant Child: Eight Steps to Better Behavior, 2nd Edition. Russell Barkley & Christine Benton, $22.95

Restore your loving relationship with your child, and bring peace to your home, with this proven program.

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Complete Booklist

Resources for Families, Caregivers and Individuals

All About Ben: Helping Children with Attachment Issues to Understand Their Feelings. Dorothy Markham & Aileen O'Donnell, $17.95 (ages 5-9)

Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today's Parents. Deborah Gray, $29.95

The Attachment Effect: Exploring the Powerful Ways Our Earliest Bond Shapes Our Relationships and Lives. Peter Lovenheim, $22.00

Attachment-Focused Parenting: Effective Strategies to Care for Children. Daniel Hughes, $42.00

The A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting: Strategies and Solutions. Sarah Naish, $31.95

Becoming Attached: First Relationships and How They Shape Our Capacity to Love. Robert Karen, $31.50

Brain-Based Parenting: the Neuroscience of Caregiving for Healthy Attachment. Daniel Hughes & Jonathan Baylin, $38.95

Connecting with Kids through Stories: Using Narratives to Facilitate Attachment in Adopted Children, 2nd Edition. Denise Lacher, Todd Nichols & Joanne May, $27.95

Creating Loving Attachments: Parenting with PACE to Nurture Confidence and Security in the Troubled Child. Daniel Hughes & Kim Golding, $33.95

The Defiant Child: a Parent’s Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Douglas Riley, $18.95

8 Keys to Building Your Best Relationships. Daniel Hughes, $21.00

Everyday Parenting with Security and Love: Using PACE to Provide Foundations for Attachment. Kim Golding, $33.95

Games and Activities for Attaching with Your Child. Deborah Gray & Megan Clarke, $22.95

The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans: How to Decode Their Behavior, Develop Unshakeable Trust, and Raise a Respectable Adult. Josh Shipp, $33.50

Love, Fear, and Health: How Our Attachments to Others Shape Health and Health Care. Robert Mauner & Jonathan Hunter, $30.95

The Neuroscience of Human Relationships: Attachment and the Developing Brain. Louis Cozolino, $63.50

New Families, Old Scripts: a Guide to the Language of Trauma and Attachment in Adoptive Families. Caroline Archer & Caroline Gordon, $36.95

No Matter What: an Adoptive Family’s Story of Hope, Love and Healing. Sally Donovan, $19.95

Parenting with Theraplay®: Understanding Attachment and How to Nurture a Closer Relationship with Your Child. Vivien Norris & Helen Rodwell, $21.95

1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2 – 12, 4th Edition. Thomas Phelan, $14.95; DVD $47.95

Parenting the Hurt Child: Helping Adoptive Families Heal and Grow. Gregory Keck & Regina Kupecky, $21.50

Raising a Secure Child: How Circle of Security Parenting Can Help You Nurture Your Child's Attachment, Emotional Resilience, and Freedom to Explore. Kent Hoffman, Glen Cooper & Bert Powell, $19.95

Reparenting the Child Who Hurts: a Guide to Healing Developmental Trauma and Attachments. Caroline Archer & Christine Gordon, $31.95

Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain, 2nd Edition. Sue Gerhardt, $37.50

Your Defiant Child: Eight Steps to Better Behavior, 2nd Edition. Russell Barkley & Christine Benton, $22.95

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